Charlie Weasley and the Art of Propositioning
by Jetainia
Summary: Part of the Impervious Aces series. Charlie is happy at the Romanian Reserve, except for all the females who keep asking for his help. Oneshot.


Charlie Weasley was busy coming up with a meal plan for the newly acquired Norwegian Ridgeback when Celine sidled up to him. He gave her a brief smile in acknowledgement and went back to his piece of parchment. Celine twirled a piece of her hair and waited expectantly. Charlie sighed, would it kill someone to do work instead of trying to entice to a night out.

He finished his sentence of ' _try with green meat, 12 pounds, with 2 scoops of nutrient powder'_ and looked at her, putting his quill in the inkwell. "Yes, Celine? What can I do for you?"

She smiled at him and placed an arm around his shoulders, pressing into him, "Well Charlie, I was wondering if you had any tips on caring for a worked-up lady."

"I see," Charlie suppressed a sigh. How some of the people on the reserve had become handlers he would never know. They kept coming up to him and asking how he took care of some type of female. Was it that hard to read a book? Nevertheless, he did not push her away, simply recalled his training and answered the question.

"What you want to do is calm her down in some way. This can be done by introducing young ones into her vicinity, feeding her enough food that she becomes drowsy or playing the right notes on a lyre. Of course, if she's really worked up, you can call in other handlers and stun her. That solve your problem?"

"Completely," she said even though she looked disappointed. She gave him a quick peck on the cheek and walked away, her hips swaying on the uneven ground. Dave came up to him a few seconds later.

"Dude, you are one lucky man."

"Yes, yes I am," Charlie agreed.

"If I could hit that, you bet I'd be there so fast all you'd see would be my dust trail."

Charlie looked up at him horrified, "You want to _hit_ Norberta?"

"Norberta? I'm not talking about dragons mate, I'm talking about Celine. The lady who just came up here and asked for your expertise in calming down a lady. Man, I tell you, I wish I had your way with women."

"You can have it, I'm getting tired of explaining the same thing over and over. Is it really that hard to open a book?"

Dave just looked at him and then burst out laughing, "You are one of a kind, Weasley. One of a kind."

"Thanks. I need to speak to Nadia about Norberta's food."

"Sure you do."

Charlie shook his head as he gathered up his parchment, quill and inkwell. What did Dave think he was going to do, steal some dragon food for himself? Sometimes it seemed as if he was the only one who took the job seriously. The others spent far too much time distracting each other with inane comments instead of focusing on the job.

"What do you say you show me how you charm the ladies, Charlie?"

Charlie looked at Marie in confusion, "You've been here longer than I have, surely you don't need my help."

"Need? Maybe not. But I would _love_ to get a first-hand experience of your abilities."

"Uh, sure. I was just about to have my daily chat with Rubea, you're welcome to join me."

She groaned and tugged his arm, "Charlie, Charlie, Charlie, that is so boring and not what I want to do with you."

"But you just said…"

"They were right, you are impossible. You even turned _me_ down."

Charlie was confused, "I didn't turn you down, I said you could come with me to see Rubea, how is that turning you down?"

Marie just shook her head and walked away. Charlie looked helplessly at his mentor, Jasper, who chuckled. "She was propositioning you, Charlie."

"Propositioning me? As in, sex?"

"Yeah, Weasley, sex."

"Oh, uh, no. No. No, I'll stick with dragons, thank you very much."

"Whatever floats your boat Weasley, you may want to tell all the females on the reserve that you're not interested though. Otherwise you'll have to deal with a lot more obscure and not so obscure offers of sex."

"Right, I'll do that. They've really been asking for sex every time they've asked me for help?"

"That they have, Charlie boy."

"Huh. That's weird," Charlie nodded once after having processed the information. He shrugged and walked away from Jasper, heading off to talk to Rubea, the dragon was very social and was always happy to see him. Plus, she didn't want to have sex with him. Always a bonus in his opinion.


End file.
